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Raj and Simran's Relationship Journey: A Therapist's Perspective- Part 1

Updated: Jul 2, 2023

(PS: This is me imagining if these film characters were real clients, how would I take their sessions as a therapist. The main intention is to show how a therapy session would look like?)

Raj and Simran's love story began in the enchanting landscapes of Europe, where their connection felt like destiny. However, their journey was not without its challenges.

Simran, raised in a traditional family, had always followed the decisions made by the male figures in her life. Despite being engaged to someone else, her heart yearned for Raj. Determined to win over Simran's family, Raj embarked on a mission to prove his worthiness, eventually gaining their acceptance.

The initial days of their marriage were filled with bliss, but as time passed, concerns surfaced. They sought therapy for three major issues: cultural differences, career choices, and dependency dynamics.

Digging deeper, we discovered that Raj and Simran had experienced a sudden move from London to India without secure jobs. The struggle to find employment and settle into a new home consumed their early days, leaving little time for each other. Unspoken expectations led to frustration, as they both desired surprises and gestures of affection but failed to communicate them effectively.

Their cultural backgrounds posed another challenge. Simran, deeply devoted, wanted to uphold their traditions, while Raj considered them a waste of time. This difference caused disappointment for Simran.

Moreover, Simran had always relied on others for decision-making, while Raj cherished his independence. Striking a balance was difficult, with Raj neglecting to inform Simran about his plans and Simran constantly awaiting his decision-making. This led to frustration on both sides.

As their therapist, we delved into their concerns and love story, seeking solutions.

We identified their love languages using Gary Chapman's framework:

1. Giving and receiving gifts

2. Words of Affirmation (Appreciation and Validation)

3. Physical touch

4. Acts of service (Doing chores together, dividing responsibilities)

5. Quality time (Going on dates, giving undivided attention)

Simran valued quality time and meaningful gestures, while Raj sought validation and acts of service. We devised a strategy for open communication and compromise. Simran expressed her desire for three planned dates per month, accompanied by small gestures like scented candles or roses.

Raj committed to informing Simran about spontaneous plans and limiting them to a reasonable frequency. They also agreed to share decision-making responsibilities, fostering interdependence and independence in their relationship.

By implementing these strategies and improving communication, Raj and Simran began to navigate their challenges.

However, they still yearned to explore their career aspirations and reignite the spark in their relationship which we will cover in Part 2 of this series.

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